Minecraft Diary

I got a demo for Minecraft when I bought the latest issue of PC Gamer, and got an idea for my next post: write a diary tracking my progress! So here it is, 5 in-game days of my Minecraft experience. Enjoy!

Day 1

I wearingly open my eyes to find that that I am on an Island. How I got here is not known. Why I am here is also an unknown. I figure if I'm going to survive on this godforsaken spit of land then I am going to need some sort of shelter. I take a few steps forward and stumble upon a crate labelled “PCG – We thought you could use some things!”. Well thanks PCG, a steel pick and axe are going to be fantastic!

I steadily got to work building an underground house. The hard work of hollowing out a large section of earth is nearly therapeutic; as if I don't mind the back breaking labour, because I know that at the end of it, I will have something of use that will probably mean the difference between life and death: a safe haven. I even build a secret exit in case the safety of my home is ever invaded. However, I need more. I need more coal, I need some Iron ore and I need some more food. After making a crafting table and a furnace I look around my home and see its fairly plain. I could make a pool If I wanted, I think I'll do that actually. A pool... never had a pool before.

Pool built! It actually works quite well, although I've had to sacrifice my secret escape route, as it emerged out in the sea. In hindsight, it wasn't really that good an escape route, but either way, my underground house now has a pool. And no direct way out. Humm, this could be problematic. However, with a bit of jiggery-pokery I find that I can swim out via my pool, so that's all good!

I need fuel for my smelter. I'm pretty sure that I could mine some iron ore, but I desperately need some fuel before any of that becomes a possibility. I take a large set of stone picks, axes and shovels and begin mining into the earth. Hopefully I should fine something of worth if I should dig deep enough. I might even dig into the core of the earth If I try hard enough!

Thankfully, that is not needed, after a few minutes digging into the corner of my abode results in greatness; I found a seam of coal! Brilliant, let's see what tomorrow will bring and what I will smelt the living shit out of.

Day 2

So far I have managed to keep myself out of trouble with the local wildlife as I have spent most of my time mining safely or building a pool, but now that I have some coal, I need to get something to use it with. I set off for untold mystery and adventure!

Well fuck, that went badly. I saw a load of sand, thinking “A glass ceiling would be perfect for my humble little crib” so I get to work, mining the shit out of the area. Well my casual mining takes me to a small pool of lava. “Wouldn't it be awesome if I could channel the lava back to my house and make some sort jacuzzi out of my pool?” I think. Well some clumsy block smashing later and I have managed to fall in the lava and die. Fuck. To top it all off, it's getting dark, fast. I rush as fast as I can back to that bastarding lava pool to try and recover what I can of all the stuff I had picked up in the last two days.

After much searching (I had found it by accident) I found the majority of my stuff, including picks, axes, and more importantly; all that SAND! On collection it falls to true night fall. I hear that sound that I had really, REALLY hoped to never, ever hear. “SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS”. Oh shit. I turn tail and run screaming like a little girl, back to my safe haven. I dig a new entrance and dive in as fast as I can, but too late. The prick had already followed me into my safe haven and exploded the second it touched my storage box. The bastard wasted shitloads of coal and wood, and especially my god damn sand, leaving me with just one and a half hearts, no bread or any food. Tomorrow had better go better than this otherwise I'm going to craft a fucking noose.

Day 3

This day, had to go better than yesterday, and well, it had. I managed to find more sand again, and after enough mooching around, a fairly large lump of coal. So now begins the re-building of my home base and finally that god damn glass ceiling can be installed. I get back to my hideout just as it gets dark again; I'm sure as shit not getting caught outside at night again. This is like freaking I Am Legend for gods sake, but with less dogs. At least I haven't seen any dogs yet.

Finally, this ceiling is done. It is something truly glorious. Something that brings nothing but awe to my blocky eyes. I love it. It was totally worth all the trouble. Honest. Not lying at all.

Day 4

Right, I need some Iron tools, my stone ones are breaking like no ones business. So, the plan for this day: Tool up on stone picks, and head as far underground/inland as possible in search of Iron or even gold. LETS DO THIS!

IRON FOUND! It didn't even take much digging, I just started attacking the side of a massive hill and hey presto, 12 cubes of iron ore, I'm going to keep digging to see what else I can uncover, although now begins the long hard slog into the centre of the island, horizontally as well as vertically.

GOD DAMMIT. I kept digging downwards, I just HAD to keep digging down, even after I had everything I needed and then some, I just HAD to keep going. Well eventually, my vertical assault of the geology of this godforsaken island resulted in me finding a massive cavern; and I had just dug through the fucking roof of it. I plunged to my doom and the words “You are Dead” appeared on screen, mocking my monumentally stupid death. New Challenge: find my new mine, get all my stuff, dig my way out and get back to my house before any monsters get me. Lets see how this one goes.

Well I got there while the sun was still up, so that was good, I even managed to get down the floor of the chasm where all my gear had landed. What I wasn't expecting was the two zombies to be lurking about, evidently waiting for me to return for my stuff. After short and less than titanic battle where I introduced their heads to my iron axe that I found on Day 1, I started exploring the cavern a bit more properly, placing torches to get a better view. After a short walk I find another big hole, peering over the edge I discovered my two mortal enemies: Lava and Creepers. Three of the bastards just sort of hopping around, looking at me. Instead of turning, running and screaming like our last encounter, I decided to do something about the Creeper scourge, and plucking up all my courage, I trapped the bastards in there, and ran away. They can be someone else's problem now. Preferably the lavas.

My next move was to find a way out of what appeared to be hell and get back to the safety of my lovely glass ceilinged home. I pick a spot at random and start carving stairs out of the rock. After a few minutes I find a load of sandstone in the sea of cobblestone and my curious nature gets the better of me. I start mining my way through it, constantly moving upwards until finally, and surprisingly, I have a torrent of water falling on my head. I swim upwards though the falling water (take that physics) and surface a few metres from the shore. I'm not even that far from my house, this is going brilliantly! Looking around, I see DAT SIGHT: a pair of Creepers hopping about on the beach. I don't think they've seen me, they seem to be more interested with bouncing around the landscape like the crowd at a ska concert. I swim away, hoping to see no more monsters this eve.

Well seeing no more monsters was clearly too much to ask for. Looking towards my home, I see a creeper swimming around, a zombie further out to sea, and a pair of skeletons on the shore. “How the living dicks am I going to get past this” I wonder to myself. This isn't going to be easy at all.

I take as wide a berth as possible and try to move towards the shining light that is my home. That glass ceiling was a better idea than I thought, I can see the light from within it, like a shining beacon of safety. With one eye on the monsters and one on the prize, I keep swimming towards home, ever terrified that something is going to start chasing me.

I made it. I fucking made it. No incident, nothing chasing me, nothing waiting for me. I made it back home! Now to smelt iron ore for the rest of the night and see what tomorrow will bring.

Day 5

Last day of the demo and I'm a bit sad. I finally have a set of iron tools, so I'm pretty psyced about that. I think I'm going to go out into the world, never to return to my home. I might flood it, so no bastarding monsters get to play in it.

Right, so that's my home flooded, it is now nothing more than a watery tomb, full of everything that I didn't need for my final goodbye. Looking down into it from the glass, I feel a slight mourning. But I shrug it off, and go exploring for my final goodbye. After traversing the giant hill that my house lay at the foot of, I found myself a few bones, an arrow or two, and a cave. I had to go in, I wasn't getting another chance to explore, so in I went. Leaving torches on the wall so they could guide me back to the surface, should I need to return. The cave eventually ends, with nothing interesting to be found. Might as well see if there is anything below then. I start my final decent into the earth. I feel a bit like a dwarf that's going to die.

I tunnel deep into the earth, and I mean DEEP. Unfortunately, nothing was to be found. At all. I'm a bit disappointed to be honest. I was hoping for lava flows, monsters and such, but nothing of the sort to be found in this mine. I eventually got bored of tunnelling into endless cobblestone and decided that I should go back up and find another cave or something, time is running out and I want to see as much as possible.

I emerge from the earth at the top of the hill that I had burrowed into the side of, and notice immediately that something is wrong; its night time. “Oh fuck,” I think, “please please PLEASE don't let there be anything too close.”. Apparently that was too much to ask, as 3 zombies and a skeleton all turn towards me and start shuffling my way. I bolt, bouncing down the hill avoiding trees and cutting my way through obstacles. A Creeper joins the chase. A spider jumps down from the tree and joins in. This is an absolute farce, my idea of a last dig has gone spectacularly tits up. I figure that if I try to dig my way out of this situation they'll be on me in seconds, my only real hope is to try and outrun them until the sun comes up.

I look up from the sand under my feet. So far I have managed to lead the ever increasing gaggle of monsters, nasties and zombies to the coast where I was attempting to just stay alive. Then I notice something that lifts my spirits like nothing else could: It was getting lighter. The sun was coming up! I was actually going to survive this nightmare! I look towards the horizon and am stunned by the simplistic beauty of the sunrise. Minecraft's graphics are simplistic and have a certain charm about them, but my god, this was actually wonderful to see. I slow down and just stare into the distance, stunned and in awe, and am promptly killed by a fucking spider.

Well this is embarrassing end to everything. Oh well, I'm going back to Dragonage: Origins.